Ian Constantine10 Reasons I hate Basketball
April 19th 2008 05:41
Warning - this may be a little tongue in cheek - if you enjoy horse racing, basketball or Motor Racing please do not read further...
What Sport do you hate the most and why?
I would have gone with Motor Racing, however I am of the view that it is not a sport, hence why I said Motor racing and NOT Motor Sport! Granted - What they can do in a car is beyond belief, the control, the guts they must have to drive at those speeds down the dipper at Mount Panorama... But I maintain it is not a sport... Even though they are superfit, it is the car that does the work... Maybe A1 Wold Cup would be the closest thing to a sport because all the cars are the same - which means the best driver wins, not the car with the most $,000s
I then considered Horse racing, but again I do not consider this a sport! When something is designed for the sole purpose of gambling, why does it feature in the sport section of my paper?
Now, in both instances I am not saying those involved are not highly skilled. They have exceptional talent, but this alone does not qualify as sport in my humble opinion.
Don’t even get me started about archery! If archery is a sport, then so too is darts and if darts is a sport; pub pool is a sport as well…. And thus I decided to tackle an American sport; Basketball, Baseball or NFL, they all seem overly American… which takes me to my 1st point:
Basketball - Why I hate it
1. It over Americanised! The Ego’s, the cheer girls, the groupies. The players are treated like rock-stars, for putting a ball in a net.
2. The Amount of money and sponsorship the NBA players receive. It is beyond a joke. For a game that is only played in 4, 12 minute quarters (NBA) it is an absolute mockery. So if a player stays on court for the entire time (unlikely) they play just longer than a half of rugby league or soccer. Shaq and Kobe Bryant have signed contracts worth over 20million dollars for a game that is over in 50mins. Meanwhile, the court is just bigger than the 18yard box in soccer. Therefore, they play only 50mins on a much reduced court, yet get paid $20million, and this is without mentioning their multimillion dollar endorsement contracts.
3. The amount of fouls and technicalities in the game drive me up the wall. I mean, charging is the softest foul. Why can’t you try and run through players, if their not strong enough to stop you that’s their problem! “Oh sir, my feet were planted…” Their 8-feet tall for heavens sake, nothing should be able to get through them! It just seems to be like a lame rule, one too open to interpretation. This is without mentioning the travelling rule. Players take a million steps, but that’s okay, they were going for a dunk….
4. Timeouts! Whilst coaches in sport are invaluable, players should be able to play the game and outthink their own opponents. To stop the whole game while a coach berates a player or a team is just pathetic. Athletes should use their own brain, not rely on coaches. Is it a sport for the players or the coaches? Or are these just 8foot giant robots running around? Then again, they are American… The game is already split into four quarters, and only 12 minute each quarter at that… What do these guys forget what the coach said five minutes ago?
5. Whiteboards! Are these men coaches or rocket scientists? The amount of diagrams and random pictures these guys draw would make Mr Squiggle blush.
6. ‘White men can’t jump’ attitude.
7. Media influence – the game was changed so that more commercials could be placed in. Yes sponsorship is important, but it should never compromise the integrity of the game.
8. Denis Rodman; enough said.
9. Shoes – the weird affixation basketball players and sympathisers have with shoes. Also, the amount of money made out of shoe contracts, it is ridiculous. The noise they make on the court is also highly nauseating.
10. It is the one sport I am not good at! I am white, small and stereotypes aside am crap at basketball. The hoop is ridiculously high, preventing me from attempting a famous dunk and thus perpetuating my sentiment of feeling small. Why should I be prevented from making money because I am not 10 feet tall?
So there you have my top 10 reasons for hating basketball...
Please note - I am aware that 9-ball pool is very popular in europe - so too is Snooker and the like - are these sports though? - I feel my next post will have to be the paramaters of what defines a sport... Pool, Darts, Motor Racing, Shooting, Horse Racing - Are these Sports?...
If it is on FoxSports - does that make it a sport... hmm that brings me to poker - perhaps next time...
As stated above - this is meant to be tongue in cheek and not meant to offend...
However I would undobtedly have hit a raw nerve somewhere in there...
What Sport do you hate the most and why?
I would have gone with Motor Racing, however I am of the view that it is not a sport, hence why I said Motor racing and NOT Motor Sport! Granted - What they can do in a car is beyond belief, the control, the guts they must have to drive at those speeds down the dipper at Mount Panorama... But I maintain it is not a sport... Even though they are superfit, it is the car that does the work... Maybe A1 Wold Cup would be the closest thing to a sport because all the cars are the same - which means the best driver wins, not the car with the most $,000s
I then considered Horse racing, but again I do not consider this a sport! When something is designed for the sole purpose of gambling, why does it feature in the sport section of my paper?
Now, in both instances I am not saying those involved are not highly skilled. They have exceptional talent, but this alone does not qualify as sport in my humble opinion.
Don’t even get me started about archery! If archery is a sport, then so too is darts and if darts is a sport; pub pool is a sport as well…. And thus I decided to tackle an American sport; Basketball, Baseball or NFL, they all seem overly American… which takes me to my 1st point:
Basketball - Why I hate it
1. It over Americanised! The Ego’s, the cheer girls, the groupies. The players are treated like rock-stars, for putting a ball in a net.
2. The Amount of money and sponsorship the NBA players receive. It is beyond a joke. For a game that is only played in 4, 12 minute quarters (NBA) it is an absolute mockery. So if a player stays on court for the entire time (unlikely) they play just longer than a half of rugby league or soccer. Shaq and Kobe Bryant have signed contracts worth over 20million dollars for a game that is over in 50mins. Meanwhile, the court is just bigger than the 18yard box in soccer. Therefore, they play only 50mins on a much reduced court, yet get paid $20million, and this is without mentioning their multimillion dollar endorsement contracts.
3. The amount of fouls and technicalities in the game drive me up the wall. I mean, charging is the softest foul. Why can’t you try and run through players, if their not strong enough to stop you that’s their problem! “Oh sir, my feet were planted…” Their 8-feet tall for heavens sake, nothing should be able to get through them! It just seems to be like a lame rule, one too open to interpretation. This is without mentioning the travelling rule. Players take a million steps, but that’s okay, they were going for a dunk….
"What do you mean foul?"
4. Timeouts! Whilst coaches in sport are invaluable, players should be able to play the game and outthink their own opponents. To stop the whole game while a coach berates a player or a team is just pathetic. Athletes should use their own brain, not rely on coaches. Is it a sport for the players or the coaches? Or are these just 8foot giant robots running around? Then again, they are American… The game is already split into four quarters, and only 12 minute each quarter at that… What do these guys forget what the coach said five minutes ago?
5. Whiteboards! Are these men coaches or rocket scientists? The amount of diagrams and random pictures these guys draw would make Mr Squiggle blush.
A simple task of putting a ball in the basket complicated
6. ‘White men can’t jump’ attitude.
7. Media influence – the game was changed so that more commercials could be placed in. Yes sponsorship is important, but it should never compromise the integrity of the game.
8. Denis Rodman; enough said.
9. Shoes – the weird affixation basketball players and sympathisers have with shoes. Also, the amount of money made out of shoe contracts, it is ridiculous. The noise they make on the court is also highly nauseating.
You have to be kidding me...
10. It is the one sport I am not good at! I am white, small and stereotypes aside am crap at basketball. The hoop is ridiculously high, preventing me from attempting a famous dunk and thus perpetuating my sentiment of feeling small. Why should I be prevented from making money because I am not 10 feet tall?
So there you have my top 10 reasons for hating basketball...
Please note - I am aware that 9-ball pool is very popular in europe - so too is Snooker and the like - are these sports though? - I feel my next post will have to be the paramaters of what defines a sport... Pool, Darts, Motor Racing, Shooting, Horse Racing - Are these Sports?...
If it is on FoxSports - does that make it a sport... hmm that brings me to poker - perhaps next time...
As stated above - this is meant to be tongue in cheek and not meant to offend...
However I would undobtedly have hit a raw nerve somewhere in there...
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Movie Train
this is a very funny read!
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have a nice day bud.
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Fret X
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