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30 Great golfing terms

April 23rd 2008 03:12
A Paris Hilton - an expensive hole



A Gary Colman - a nasty 5 footer



A Salman Rushdie - an impossible read



A Rio Ferdinand - lipped out



A Johnny Holmes - thought it was straight, but it wasn't



A Cuban - needs one more revolution



An Elton John - a big bender that lips the rim



An Adolf Hitler - two shots in the bunker




A Yasser Arafat - ugly and in the sand



A Kate Winslett - little bit fat but otherwise perfect



A Gerry Adams - playing a Provisional



A Glen Miller - kept low but didn't make it over the water



An Arthur Scargill - a great strike but a poor result



A Russell Grant - a fat iron



A Rodney King - over-clubbed



An O.J. Simpson - got away with it



A Princess Grace - should have taken a driver



A Princess Di - shouldn't have taken a driver



A Robin Cook - just died on the hill



A Michael Jackson - gradually fading




A Douglas Bader - looked good in the air, but didn't have the legs



A Ken Livingstone - quite far left



A Jean-Marie LePen - a long way right



A Ladyboy - looks like an easy hole but all is not what it seems



A Mrs Patel - ugly, but a good worker



A condom - safe but didn't feel real good



A circus tent - a BIG top



An Anna Kournikova - looks great, but unlikely to get a result



A Vinnie Jones - nasty kick when you're not expecting it



A Cathy Freeman - ugly, but runs like F**k



A Liz McColgan - ugly but runs forever



A Brazilian - shaves both sides of the hole
50
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